Post by myamber20 on Oct 7, 2005 6:08:09 GMT -5
my amber 20 was planning and i with her to move out with her boyfriend they had just been together roughly 6 months.
damn it i liked him at first just in the last month, he quit his job lying drinking, she never asked to move back here it was an understanding because even tho we had a special bond it just woulnt work. i have and would of done anything for my amber. i dont think she wanting to come back here anyway with statements that she would make in the past. she wanted her independency. of course if i knew this would happen my baby would be here. we went out to eat a lot together, she would tellme that "alex " is stupid. you got to get away from that ass. from that i could tell there was no violence. holly and dave had been her friends i thought it was odd that she didnt see holly after a month or so with alex. i am learning a lot now about alex...tooo late. In the last month or so he didnt pay bills that amber the only working person in the household would give him money to pay a bill and would not pay it. of course you should get mad at him for that i told amber. he (alex) was only 30 he served 8 years and was informed that he was a deserter, he had some lame excuse i know now. he tried to get amber to join the army. amber told me alex asked if he could join again. and the answer was a no. when i look back (i am so stupid) thats when his useless ways started. amber told me he did a lot for her what? i asked he replied i served the country for you. ahh gees we said to eachother. please believe me this big change in alex was aware to me in the last month before he killed her. he lied to her about going to work, drinking beer, which i asked if he hurt her and shesaid no just got stupid and passsed out (stupid meaning saying stupid things) he played on his comp all night. violent games. often i would call her and she wouldnt answer. when she finally did i would jokingly say its about time. she was my world i would of done anything for her, and we loved eachother like no other. i dont thinkalex liked that either. amber was a sweet, upbeat, beautiful girl. alex was a loner, quiet, i dont think he liked that either. my last conversatin with amber after many attempts on the day she died was after i finally left a message to call me and she dii had a place for her in the area well thats sounds ok she said she said she wanted another job (2 jobs before she moved) well why you would save money, your not now,i will help you. she said she would look at it. and i asked her if alex thought i was crazy for callin all day and amber says thats ok your miss. she didnt call me mom she called me miss. now i am in such darkness. i have had many tragedies. i can personally tell you losing a child is the worst. i lost my brother pat of lung cancer in 2000.
my mother was murdered at the hands of amber father, in 1989. yes ambers father. my mother was shot as well as amber was my mother died in my arms. me and amber and ambers sister were seperated from thier father, he wanted me back. if it wasnt me he could kill it was my mother, she was the only one up at the time. yes i have another daughter but for the past year she hasnt talked to the family. I would ask amber what did i do? and she would say nothing miss shes just stupid or shes just a b@@@@. now ambers sister has a baby . 2 months old my daughter just called me yesterday we talked of ambers death. she said she wanted to come over (wow thats a start) are you bringing the baby noshe said why grandma wants to see her. no you said i guess i did that i would never babysit her. so i dont see her ever. im the only momyou willl ever have i told her. i know she said. i told her you should live for the future and not in the past. but your past is your future. no i said. i remember my mom when amber was 5 months old and i was seperated from thier father. (my mothers killer) mymom told me if you go back to him i dont want to see you or the baby. people say things, dont mean it i seen my mother with myamber and then with my other daughter. it is a shame that my youngest daughter is treating me this way at a time of much need and no hatred. i miss my amber....please come back to me. i loved you so much........ambers mom carolyn
damn it i liked him at first just in the last month, he quit his job lying drinking, she never asked to move back here it was an understanding because even tho we had a special bond it just woulnt work. i have and would of done anything for my amber. i dont think she wanting to come back here anyway with statements that she would make in the past. she wanted her independency. of course if i knew this would happen my baby would be here. we went out to eat a lot together, she would tellme that "alex " is stupid. you got to get away from that ass. from that i could tell there was no violence. holly and dave had been her friends i thought it was odd that she didnt see holly after a month or so with alex. i am learning a lot now about alex...tooo late. In the last month or so he didnt pay bills that amber the only working person in the household would give him money to pay a bill and would not pay it. of course you should get mad at him for that i told amber. he (alex) was only 30 he served 8 years and was informed that he was a deserter, he had some lame excuse i know now. he tried to get amber to join the army. amber told me alex asked if he could join again. and the answer was a no. when i look back (i am so stupid) thats when his useless ways started. amber told me he did a lot for her what? i asked he replied i served the country for you. ahh gees we said to eachother. please believe me this big change in alex was aware to me in the last month before he killed her. he lied to her about going to work, drinking beer, which i asked if he hurt her and shesaid no just got stupid and passsed out (stupid meaning saying stupid things) he played on his comp all night. violent games. often i would call her and she wouldnt answer. when she finally did i would jokingly say its about time. she was my world i would of done anything for her, and we loved eachother like no other. i dont thinkalex liked that either. amber was a sweet, upbeat, beautiful girl. alex was a loner, quiet, i dont think he liked that either. my last conversatin with amber after many attempts on the day she died was after i finally left a message to call me and she dii had a place for her in the area well thats sounds ok she said she said she wanted another job (2 jobs before she moved) well why you would save money, your not now,i will help you. she said she would look at it. and i asked her if alex thought i was crazy for callin all day and amber says thats ok your miss. she didnt call me mom she called me miss. now i am in such darkness. i have had many tragedies. i can personally tell you losing a child is the worst. i lost my brother pat of lung cancer in 2000.
my mother was murdered at the hands of amber father, in 1989. yes ambers father. my mother was shot as well as amber was my mother died in my arms. me and amber and ambers sister were seperated from thier father, he wanted me back. if it wasnt me he could kill it was my mother, she was the only one up at the time. yes i have another daughter but for the past year she hasnt talked to the family. I would ask amber what did i do? and she would say nothing miss shes just stupid or shes just a b@@@@. now ambers sister has a baby . 2 months old my daughter just called me yesterday we talked of ambers death. she said she wanted to come over (wow thats a start) are you bringing the baby noshe said why grandma wants to see her. no you said i guess i did that i would never babysit her. so i dont see her ever. im the only momyou willl ever have i told her. i know she said. i told her you should live for the future and not in the past. but your past is your future. no i said. i remember my mom when amber was 5 months old and i was seperated from thier father. (my mothers killer) mymom told me if you go back to him i dont want to see you or the baby. people say things, dont mean it i seen my mother with myamber and then with my other daughter. it is a shame that my youngest daughter is treating me this way at a time of much need and no hatred. i miss my amber....please come back to me. i loved you so much........ambers mom carolyn