Post by Bosco29 on Jan 7, 2005 14:14:31 GMT -5
On October 28th, my uncle murdered his wife (my favorite aunt) and then killed himself. They had two kids (ages 18 and 20) who were not present at the time of their deaths. I have posted a few times but have found it hard to keep posting - think I'm stuck in the denial phase.
My cousins are both going to group therapy sessions, but being in Minnesota and North Dakota, there really aren't very many people who have experienced a loss like this. They have a couple people who have experience for instance, their uncle murdering their grandfather. But not their own father murdering their mother. The 18 year old came to North Dakota to live with my fiance and I for about a month but after a few instances with drugs in our house, my fiance and I ordered him to either get some treatment or get out. He chose inpatient treatment and then backed out at the last minute. We told him he could not live with us until he was completely clean. He's now lying and saying he is clean and that he quit cold turkey (yeah right). The 20 year old cousin isn't on drugs, thank goodness, and he's living in Minneapolis/St. Paul, MN. They really have no one that understands them and as much as I'm hurting for the loss of my aunt and uncle to something as horriffic as this, I have no words to try to help them get through their own pain. The 20 year old is planning on moving to California to live with another cousin and get away from Minnesota. The two find it very hard to stay in Minnesota with all of those horrible memories. I think moving will be good for him although I will miss him very much. He calls every day to talk and is one of the funniest people I know. Even after all of this, he still has both of his parents' sense of humor.
Wow, I could really go on about all of this. I'll have to write more later because this really feels good to get some of it out.
Thanks for listening,
Heather in North Dakota
{and of course all the fur-family: Bosco (border collie); Winter (jack russel/pit bull mix); Dori (pit bull); Ivy (my aunt and uncle's shepherd/doberman mix); Winston (my aunt and uncle's husky/beagle mix); and the three bunnies - Mildred, Tasha, and Sally.}
My cousins are both going to group therapy sessions, but being in Minnesota and North Dakota, there really aren't very many people who have experienced a loss like this. They have a couple people who have experience for instance, their uncle murdering their grandfather. But not their own father murdering their mother. The 18 year old came to North Dakota to live with my fiance and I for about a month but after a few instances with drugs in our house, my fiance and I ordered him to either get some treatment or get out. He chose inpatient treatment and then backed out at the last minute. We told him he could not live with us until he was completely clean. He's now lying and saying he is clean and that he quit cold turkey (yeah right). The 20 year old cousin isn't on drugs, thank goodness, and he's living in Minneapolis/St. Paul, MN. They really have no one that understands them and as much as I'm hurting for the loss of my aunt and uncle to something as horriffic as this, I have no words to try to help them get through their own pain. The 20 year old is planning on moving to California to live with another cousin and get away from Minnesota. The two find it very hard to stay in Minnesota with all of those horrible memories. I think moving will be good for him although I will miss him very much. He calls every day to talk and is one of the funniest people I know. Even after all of this, he still has both of his parents' sense of humor.
Wow, I could really go on about all of this. I'll have to write more later because this really feels good to get some of it out.
Thanks for listening,
Heather in North Dakota
{and of course all the fur-family: Bosco (border collie); Winter (jack russel/pit bull mix); Dori (pit bull); Ivy (my aunt and uncle's shepherd/doberman mix); Winston (my aunt and uncle's husky/beagle mix); and the three bunnies - Mildred, Tasha, and Sally.}