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Post by c21king2queen on Oct 1, 2010 15:59:25 GMT -5
Yesterday, September 30th was the 4 year Wedding Anniversary that my husband and I should have celebrated together. For the 3rd year I was alone on our Anniversary. We were married for about a year and a half when he was murdered. The first anniversary without him, I spent a few days in a cabin on the the river in the mountains, the same cabin we rented for our 1st Wedding Anniversary and enjoyed together. I also visited his grave. Last year I visited his grave and left flowers, tears, and prayers. This year I wanted to visit his grave on his anniversary, but my son and I have been so sick all week. I couldn't go. It made me sad that I couldn't go to his grave on our Anniversary. I will try to go within the next few weeks and visit his grave, but it is not the same as going on the day of our Anniversary. I know that my husband is in Heaven watching over us and he knows that I love him and miss him so much everyday. He is in my heart and soul forever. I keep hoping and praying for Justice. My heart and prayers go out to all Murder Victim Survivors.
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Post by Janet-Beth's Mom on Oct 2, 2010 22:42:00 GMT -5
You deserved to have Happy Anniversaries together big cyber (((HUGS))) to you c21
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Post by c21king2queen on Oct 5, 2010 15:58:28 GMT -5
Thanks Janet-Beth's Mom. We should have had 50 years or more together, instead it was only about a year and a half. Our happy years and life together was cut far too short and ended so tragically, traumatically, and so devastatingly. I have good memories of my husband. I will remember him the way he was. He will always be in my heart and soul. I love him and miss him so much everyday. I wish I could wave a magic wand and make it so that his murder would have never happened and he would be alive and well right now. Unfortunately, no one can undo what has been done. No one can give back, repay or replace what has been taken from my husband, son, and I. All I can do is live with the memories and love in my heart and soul and focus on protecting and raising my son. Anniversaries and holidays are still so hard to deal with. I guess it never really gets easier or better. I know that what I have been through, I will never get over or forget. I just have to live with it. I am learning everyday to live with it. Most people don't seem to understand. I am also learning to live with that and deal with things on my own. I pray for courage, wisdom, guidance, and protection from God everyday.
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