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Why?
Jan 13, 2011 3:46:50 GMT -5
Post by dblvictim on Jan 13, 2011 3:46:50 GMT -5
It was over two years ago when my husband and youngest son were taken from me and our family. Still, we have no answers. But, even if someone could explain the 'why" it would not make a difference. Everyday we will still be missing them in our lives. Still have to feel the emptiness that was left in our hearts. I still have the anger, the emptiness, and I still have to remind myself that this is my reality. The other night I had a dream and my husbsand was there. We were in the house I grew-up in, I walked out back, and the fence was gone from around the yard. Then I noticed the dogs were gone. I asked him where they were, he said that he took them and let them go. He couldn't get ahold of any of us. I was crying and started hitting him sand yelling at him that it's his fsault that I have lost everything in my life that I had ever loved. He reached out for me and he was crying and telling me he was sorry. Then I woke-up. The entire day I felt disconnected from myself. The last time i had a dream, he was there and we were in the same house. But that time I was telling him he had to lesave because I wanted my house bsack. He just smiled sand said ok. Anyone have any ideas about the dream?:
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Why?
Jan 13, 2011 23:49:35 GMT -5
Post by Janet-Beth's Mom on Jan 13, 2011 23:49:35 GMT -5
I've never been able to understand my dreams. Some people who have read about analyzing dreams have told me what they thought they meant at times.
I think I might understand feeling disconnected. When I do see her in my dreams I usually feel distracted and worn out that day. They are usually the kind I startle awake from. The peaceful dreams are the rarest, but all I know is I wish there could be more of those.
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Why?
Jan 22, 2011 16:19:11 GMT -5
Post by c21king2queen on Jan 22, 2011 16:19:11 GMT -5
It sounds like there is at least some part of you that is angry with your husband or blames your husband for what has happened. May'be there is a part of yourself that blames you or is angry at yourself. You should put the blame where the blame really lies with the person or people who are really responsible. We should all put the blame where the blame lies. I know I have had some wierd dreams and spent time feeling angry with my husband and myself and blaming my husband and myself, but we are not at fault. The people who planned, conspired, and murdered my husband are to blame. The people who entered my home and car repeatedly and illegally, following my husband's murder, are at fault. I think all Murder Victim Survivors have nightmares relating to what we have been through or dreams about our lost loved ones. Anyone who suffers from any extinct of Post Traumatic Stress deals with dreams and nightmares. There is also anxiety and fear. It is good for you to share by talking to someone about it or even just sharing it here with other MVS. Those of us here on this site can certainly understand. It has been nearly 3 years since my husband was murdered. What I have been going through, I know I will never get over or forget. I just have to live with it. We were given no choice. We all just have to learn to live with it and struggle to get to a more positive point in our lives. Hugs and Prayers to you!!
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Why?
Jan 22, 2011 23:42:36 GMT -5
Post by anakahashi008 on Jan 22, 2011 23:42:36 GMT -5
While I am not an expert in dream analysis, I have spent a few years studying the matter. While I do not know your beliefs or way of living I will put this down here as if I were speaking to my best friend in that state of openness. Please weigh the perspective for yourself.
I always consider a dream with a dying or deceased person to be a visitation from the spirit/essence/soul/etc. of the person. Houses, buildings are often considered as a the body of your life. You are in your life when inside your property, the back yard is another element of your life, in this case the dogs may have been a representations for the loving companionship that one can feel as missing after circumstances of loss.
I don't feel a persons personality changes too much in death. I don't know your husband but, if he were the type of person to apologize for things that were truly out of his control or things that resulted from a minor mistake (ie: turn right instead of left) it may be a consideration for the words he chose.
You may or may not be upset at him for leaving and that is something I believe many if not all of us have felt in some small way at times. I know I sometimes slip and blame it just a little on Kelly that she left that night instead of staying home as she normally would've done, but still three others were still to be killed in my circle that night.
* I wrote until this point a chose to look at earlier posts of your circumstance still choose to go with what I originally wrote.
What a truly strong person you are to be living through this. It may not feel that way all the time, but it is there. Nothing I've read makes you crazy, only points out that you are a human susceptible to feeling pain, and hope that pain eases every new day for you and yours.
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Why?
Jan 31, 2011 22:18:05 GMT -5
Post by kmwhitley on Jan 31, 2011 22:18:05 GMT -5
I also experience strange dreams and I used to try to figure them out in the beginning 17 years ago and what they mean but never could figure it all out. I actually had a reoccuring nightmare that started a couple of months before my mom was murdered that someone was going to be killed by gunshot but never could see the person being shot in my dream (i'd always wake up before that part). I discussed it with my mom but she told me "don't dream those kind of dreams" and i said "I can't help what I dream about" and that was the end of it...then she was shot shortly after.
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Why?
Feb 1, 2011 15:38:20 GMT -5
Post by anakahashi008 on Feb 1, 2011 15:38:20 GMT -5
I also experience strange dreams and I used to try to figure them out in the beginning 17 years ago and what they mean but never could figure it all out. I actually had a reoccuring nightmare that started a couple of months before my mom was murdered that someone was going to be killed by gunshot but never could see the person being shot in my dream (i'd always wake up before that part). I discussed it with my mom but she told me "don't dream those kind of dreams" and i said "I can't help what I dream about" and that was the end of it...then she was shot shortly after. I just try not to remember dreams now... I'd rather not remember than have dreams like. Mine never recurred, it was just one vivid and confusing experience that made fear of sleep.
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