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Post by c21king2queen on Jun 5, 2011 12:32:09 GMT -5
Not long after my husband was murdered, April 26, 2008, I had one of many dreams since his murder. In this particular dream a vision of pages, many pages, of a document appeared to me. I thought I saw myself signing or someone signing this document. It occurred to me that it was a Last Will and Testament. Somehow I thought may'be it was forshadowing things to come and that I would have to prepare my Last Will and Testament. In a sense, yes. Now I think I finally understand what that dream really represents. It was the Last Will and Testament of Jesus and it lives within my heart and soul. I do need to live my life and prepare for whatever is to come, as we all do. I am a child of God, Widow, Mother of a child living with Autism, and a Murder Victim Survivor. I have to protect and raise my son. I am still waiting for 2 murder trials, one for each of the 2 murder suspects who murdered my husband for evil, selfish, and greedy reasons. I pray for God's hand of Justice. I pray for God's mercy and love.
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Post by Janet-Beth's Mom on Jun 6, 2011 16:33:26 GMT -5
"Acceptance" of what we must walk around in, of the fact they are forever gone even though it is so wrong - those things have been (and sometimes are) very very hard for me too. I never wanted to spend the rest of my life without my daughter. She was supposed to be one of the ones who buried me. And we never ever asked for any of this. But "acceptance" of what we must walk around in, IMO that's a big part of getting to where we can do it a bit better at least. There have been many things along this road that I have changed what I thought about them along the way (just as you changed what you thought about the dream). But some things have remained the same since day one. One was when my husband and I were with my daughter in that hospital - I knew that anyone so evil they could do THAT to someone so kind and gentle as our Beth - no one anywhere, not even in prison, would ever be safe around them. That hasn't changed one bit. I believe one of the biggest reasons we stand up for justice is for the protection of others from them. They have already proven what they will do. So, dear C21, I will continue to pray for justice with you, and for God's mercy and love and whatever comfort there can be for you and your son and all of us here.
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Post by c21king2queen on Jun 9, 2011 17:17:41 GMT -5
You are right about fighting for Justice for what they did to my husband and to protect others. The main suspect who murdered my husband has a previous record for other violent offenses. He was a fugitive of Justice from one state for a violent offense, I think it was assault, when he was arrested in another state for attempted 1st degree murder and aggravated assault. He spent 10 years in prison for 2nd degree attempted murder and aggravated assault. Less than 2years after his release he murdered my husband. He should be locked up for life and death should be the only way out for him so he doesn't have a chance to hurt any more innocent people. Because of all that I have been going through, I now have to be aware of my surroundings, alert and on guard at all times. The world is not as safe as it used to be. The way I see things has changed. Everything has changed. Even I have changed. I am not the same person I used to be. I am hanging on to my faith in God. Praying everyday for God's hand of Justice, Love and Mercy for all Victims.
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