Post by punishment on Oct 14, 2011 3:43:27 GMT -5
I suppose that this will be an introductory thread. I wish I could say that I am glad to be a member of this forum now. No offense. I'd rather have my grandfather back.
My grandfather was carjacked in early July. He died last Monday due to a result of massive brain trauma that was sustained in the attack. He fought valiantly for three months, but it was just too much in the end for an 81-year-old man to handle. His funeral is set for Saturday.
The carjacker is in custody, but there isn't any word on criminal proceedings yet. I know that the DA is pushing for homicide charges, but that's about it.
This entire ordeal has been very traumatic for my family. My father (grandpa's son) has been nearly inconsolable for days, my mother is having panic attacks, and my little brother is coping the worst. He's simply locked himself away in his room and refuses to talk to anybody about his feelings.
I'm fortunate that I have my wife and children to help. However, I already struggle with PTSD related to my service in Iraq and this ordeal has made me see a huge relapse. The only sleep I've gotten over the past three days in one alcohol-induced slumber late last night.
It's hard. I'll forget about the trial and the funeral and grandpa's last three months of suffering for a moment and then I'll see something that reminds me. Yesterday I was brought to tears while grocery shopping because I saw a display of animal crackers, and I remembered how my grandfather used to keep a box of them in his cupboard for when I would visit. And then I'm angry, then I'm sad, then I'm depressed and then I don't know what I should feel anymore. I mostly remember how my grandfather will never have the chance to do that for his great-grandchildren.
I know that death is always hard for a family, but I think that dealing with natural causes would have been easier for us.
Right now, I'm not really sure what to do. I want to give advise to my family during the upcoming trial, but I know that I also need to be able to talk to somebody about this. That, more than anything, is why I started this thread, to talk to people who have experienced the same feelings that I'm feeling right now.
And here's my big question right now: does it get any easier with time? It's so strange to think that I can look at a single face and identify that person as the sole cause of my grandfather's death. Right now, I can look at any number of things in my home--the blanket that his wife knit for me when I was a baby, the teddy bear that they gave me when I was a toddler that I passed on to my own daughter--and I can't help but remember the terrible way that I died. I want to remember my grandfather for the way he lived, and I'm scared that I'll never be able to do that.
My grandfather was carjacked in early July. He died last Monday due to a result of massive brain trauma that was sustained in the attack. He fought valiantly for three months, but it was just too much in the end for an 81-year-old man to handle. His funeral is set for Saturday.
The carjacker is in custody, but there isn't any word on criminal proceedings yet. I know that the DA is pushing for homicide charges, but that's about it.
This entire ordeal has been very traumatic for my family. My father (grandpa's son) has been nearly inconsolable for days, my mother is having panic attacks, and my little brother is coping the worst. He's simply locked himself away in his room and refuses to talk to anybody about his feelings.
I'm fortunate that I have my wife and children to help. However, I already struggle with PTSD related to my service in Iraq and this ordeal has made me see a huge relapse. The only sleep I've gotten over the past three days in one alcohol-induced slumber late last night.
It's hard. I'll forget about the trial and the funeral and grandpa's last three months of suffering for a moment and then I'll see something that reminds me. Yesterday I was brought to tears while grocery shopping because I saw a display of animal crackers, and I remembered how my grandfather used to keep a box of them in his cupboard for when I would visit. And then I'm angry, then I'm sad, then I'm depressed and then I don't know what I should feel anymore. I mostly remember how my grandfather will never have the chance to do that for his great-grandchildren.
I know that death is always hard for a family, but I think that dealing with natural causes would have been easier for us.
Right now, I'm not really sure what to do. I want to give advise to my family during the upcoming trial, but I know that I also need to be able to talk to somebody about this. That, more than anything, is why I started this thread, to talk to people who have experienced the same feelings that I'm feeling right now.
And here's my big question right now: does it get any easier with time? It's so strange to think that I can look at a single face and identify that person as the sole cause of my grandfather's death. Right now, I can look at any number of things in my home--the blanket that his wife knit for me when I was a baby, the teddy bear that they gave me when I was a toddler that I passed on to my own daughter--and I can't help but remember the terrible way that I died. I want to remember my grandfather for the way he lived, and I'm scared that I'll never be able to do that.