Post by feeney on Apr 24, 2012 0:17:20 GMT -5
My father was murdered in July of 2011 - the trial for his killers (5 people are charged with conspiracy although only one carried out the actual act) will start in a few weeks. Throughout this entire ordeal one thing that has really disappointed me is the lack of support from my family members. My mother died years ago and I have no siblings but I do have aunts and uncles and cousins who knew my Dad and were close to him for 40 years and just act like nothing happened. I live away from most of them and other than 3 or 4 phone calls a fews days after the actual murder not one of them has called or written to see how things are going. They don't even know that there is a trial and I am not going to bother telling them as they don't care. I work full time, my husband works overseas and we have three small children. I was very close to my Dad and between the grief, isolation and total lack of support form my "loved ones" I feel like I am crumbling. My husband tells me that they just can't deal with it but guess what neither can I. What upsets me the most is that over the years when any of them were ill or needed help my Dad always visited or showed his support. I have such incredible anger towards them and no way to express it. I worry a lot about my kids. They only have myself and my husband and I keep wondering what if something happens to us? who will care for them? It doesn't seem unthinkable anymore that something terrible could happen to one or both of us. I can't rely on family to step up and do the right thing. My father was my safety net which I took for granted all these years. I have some good friends who helped me a lot (and some who also turned away) but friends can only do so much and I just can't seem to get past how upset I am with my family. I read somewhere that murder is like a disease that people think they can catch so they avoid those close to the victim. I think it's sad but true.