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Post by shelvis3 on Sept 3, 2012 15:26:03 GMT -5
My cousin, Darrin, a paraplegic, was murdered on January 18, 2012. Darrin was the kindest soul, who was not without his personal demons, would not have ever harmed anyone. Unfortunately, the same cannot be said about the person who took his life.
I have had nights where I am unable to sleep because I can not help but think of how this person brutally beat my cousin to death. The pain Darrin must have felt as this person took away his life. It hurts me to the very depths of my soul.
Some days I want to know why; why did he do this to Darrin?! But then, I think, do I really want to know the reason, because the knowing will not bring Darrin back to us.
I am angry and sad.
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Post by Janet-Beth's Mom on Sept 5, 2012 20:32:30 GMT -5
My cousin, Darrin, a paraplegic, was murdered on January 18, 2012. Darrin was the kindest soul, who was not without his personal demons, would not have ever harmed anyone. Unfortunately, the same cannot be said about the person who took his life. I have had nights where I am unable to sleep because I can not help but think of how this person brutally beat my cousin to death. The pain Darrin must have felt as this person took away his life. It hurts me to the very depths of my soul. Some days I want to know why; why did he do this to Darrin?! But then, I think, do I really want to know the reason, because the knowing will not bring Darrin back to us. I am angry and sad. Dear Shelle, I am so sorry your cousin Darrin was taken from you and your family. Unfortunately the sleepless nights just seemed to be part of what I had to learn to live with, and do for many of us for a long time. One of the things I found that helped to release some of the tension was walking, especially walking in nature. Exercise is supposed to be one of the best natural tension relievers. Nothing could take it all away, but it seemed to help some. I also know people who have tried meditation, and some have asked their doctors for medication to help them rest. But please be sure to at least lay down and rest when you can, even if you can't sleep. I would read a book too, something peaceful, to take my mind away from those terrible racing thoughts hopefully. Take the best care of you that you can. I used to wonder "why, why, why" much of the time myself too. I think we all do. It's so incomprehensible. Taking care of you, and taking the next step to get through the next day are what is important for now . ((((HUGS)))) to you Janet
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Post by cowsrmom on Oct 2, 2012 22:11:02 GMT -5
Shelvis... Very, very sorry to hear about Darrin. It is horrible to imagine a person so depraved as to beat a defenceless person. It makes me very angry inside to think of it.
Just wanted to tell you that I too felt the pain and fear of my niece who was strangled and went over and over the imagined scenario in my mind all the time. I didn't sleep either. I also felt so bad for my brother and sister-in-law as well that I was in a state of worry constantly. So unfortunately, no sleep is pretty much par for the course. The best advice I got was not to fight insomnia; to work with it. Get up, do something then try again later. And also, rest is almost as healing as sleep. Even if you can lie down, close your eyes and still your body for 15 minutes or however long you can.
So today after four years of this, I have a lot of wrinkles that otherwise I probably would not have. But I also can maybe help someone else because I am going through this with them. Having someone to listen or be with you and not try to 'cheer you up' is good.
Rest now........
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